Watch Her Series: Alexia Wussow(NAM Miss Arizona 2024)♡

Welcome to the Watch Her Series! Introducing you to extraordinary women you should be watching…
Today I’m featuring another Miss Sister Queen and the current NAM Miss Arizona!

Thank you Alexia for joining me on the Watch Her Series! Read about Alexia’s self acceptance journey below!

How would you describe your journey towards self-acceptance?

I performed in several theatrical productions in my teens, and I was constantly being compared to the other girls - one in particular. She was better than me at just about everything and the directors were sure to remind me of that often. I started to believe that I was just never going to be good enough at anything, no matter how hard I worked to improve. My perfectionism and possible autism (self-diagnosed, though seeking professional opinion) made it really challenging to view myself objectively, and I attached my worth to my usefulness and ability to perform. I burned myself out pretty quickly feeling like 110% would never be enough to give.

I’ve spent so much of my life trying not to be the negative things people have said about me. “You’re annoying” okay, I’ll stop talking so much. “You’re too quiet” okay, what can I say that is nourishing to the conversation? “Just make small talk” okay, how’s the weather? It always seemed like no matter what I did, I could never be what people wanted me to be, which all multiplied when I started dating a narcissist. Sparing the details, he completely tore down my sense of self. I had to start over in so many areas, I felt like a failure at being... me. I’ve spent the last several years rebuilding and getting to know me again. I still struggle with a lot of the same things, but I’m wiser now. It’s as if my psyche had been stripped bare, leaving me with just me, not the thoughts other people left behind.

What aspects of yourself have you found most challenging to embrace?

I struggled a lot with my body image as a pre-teen and teen (who didn’t). I was often surrounded by petite girls, and when I looked at myself standing next to them, I imagined copying an image and enlarging it just enough that it looks weird next to the original. I had horrible acne from age 13-20, and my face still has the scars from when I’d obsessively pick at it. I never liked my face shape, and my eyebrows were super bushy. It was a rare occasion when I truly felt pretty.

I still weigh more than I ought to, but I’m living much more healthfully now. I’ve healed my relationship with food and I actually drink water. I know I’m on a path that will keep me healthy mentally and physically, so I’m happy to look how I do. I take better care of my skin, and I like showing my acne scars to teens also struggling with acne - partially as a warning to take the best care possible and partially to show that it happens and should not make you any less beautiful. My eyebrows are still a work in progress, but one battle at a time.

I struggle with the thoughts that I am annoying. It’s hard for me to share in conversation because I can get excited and ramble or get too loud. I’m trying to challenge myself to speak up anyway, but that’s a rollercoaster with many more highs and lows than others (for me).

Can you share a turning point when you began to fully embrace who you are?

After my abusive relationship came to an end, I had to start over. Few of my interests and passions survived, and my relationships with many people I cared for most were tarnished. I felt like the worst version of me. Like I had stepped into an alternate reality where everything was just... a little off. I took it one step at a time to get to know me again. I started with my faith, which remains first and foremost in my life. We are fearfully and wonderfully made in the image of God, and He is the One who assigns my worth, no one else. I gradually began to find myself again in Him, this time deeper and more authentic. I became a new person, and I’m still learning new things about her everyday, but each step is more meaningful than I ever anticipated.

How have societal beauty standards influenced your journey of self-acceptance?

I always felt rather average in looks: brown hair, fair skin, medium height, etc. I never felt like there was anything remarkable about me, and beauty standards always seemed to infer you needed to have some wow factor. I didn’t feel pretty without a pint of concealer over my breakouts and acne scars, and it felt like my “awkward stage” took 10 years at least. Then, I thought about Belle from Beauty and the Beast. She by definition sounds rather average in looks: brown hair, fair skin, medium height; yet she was considered the most beautiful in the town. I read a quote from the animators explaining that she always has a piece of hair out of place, symbolizing beauty in imperfection. Her heart was what made her beautiful. Since then, I stopped caring about society’s beauty standards - oftentimes going directly against them, and started focusing on beautifying my heart.

Trends come and go. In the 2000s, the pencil thin brow trend forced so many girls to over-pluck their beautiful brows. Thick, blocky brows had their day in the 2010s and girls felt obligated to fill in the now sparse hairs with gel. Now, natural brows are in (though I hear thin brows are coming back). It’s a never-ending cycle, so why stress about keeping with it?

Celebrities loading up with fillers and botox and telling everyone it’s natural is criminal in my opinion. I’m so grateful I hit a point of just being over it before this wave started sweeping the US (and the UK). No one needs to inject chemicals into their face to be beautiful - least of all teens and young adults.

What advice would you give to someone struggling to embrace their authentic self?

You are created in the image of God. He designed you and each of your features with care and with love, and He doesn’t make mistakes - EVER. He loves you more than you could ever know or comprehend, just the way you are. You are designed with a purpose. Don’t let anyone else make you think otherwise, because God (and I) are rooting for you every day. You are beautiful and you will do amazing things - even when you don’t see it.